Parenthood & Children


The Evolution of Moms

Yes, parenthood changes everything. But parenthood also changes with each baby. Here, some of the ways having a second and third child differs from having your first:


Sports Nicknames

When one of my neighbors was in high school, he mentioned that he'd like to have a cool nickname for the football team, kind of like the "Ragin' Cajuns."

Unfortunately, however, his team was called the Spartans....


Ouch!

Two five year old boys are sitting in a hospital room. One leans over to the other and says, "What are you in here for?" The other says, "circumcision." The first boy says, "Oh, I had that done right after I was born...I couldn't walk for a year."


Service?

One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Johnny was staring up at the large plaque that hung in the foyer of the church. The seven-year-old had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the pastor walked up, stood beside the boy, and said quietly, "Good morning son."

"Good morning pastor" replied the young man, focused on the plaque.

"Sir, what is this?" Johnny asked.

"Well son, these are all the people who have died in the service," replied the pastor.

Soberly, they stood together, staring at the large plaque.

Little Johnny's voice barely broke the silence when he asked quietly, "Which one sir, the 8:30 or the 10:30 service?"


Bad Baby

An old country doctor was called out to the boondocks to deliver a baby. It was really far away and there was no electricity.

When the doctor arrived, no one was home except for the laboring mother and her five-year-old child. The doctor instructed the child to hold a lantern high so that he could see while he helped the woman deliver the baby. The child did so, the mother pushed, and after a little while, the doctor lifted the newborn baby by the feet and spanked him on the bottom to get him to take his first breath.

"Hit him again, Doc! Hit him again!" the five-year-old said. "He shouldn't have crawled up there in the first place!"


Page last updated on: 1/27/2002